Genuine

            Andrea loved walking the streets of New York City. The colors, the lights, the excited milling crowds enthralled her.

            She’d planned on a short, three-day stay, long enough to see some of the sights, but not too long to tax her budget. For months, Andrea researched things to do in the city, narrowing her list down to what she hoped was doable.

            A friend had told Andrea to get up early in the morning, join the line at the Thx booth in order to score reduced price tickets for Broadway plays. While she stood there, the air brisk and fog spewing out of everyone’s mouths, a light rain began to fall.

            Venders appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, lost-cost umbrellas being hawked.

            At first Andrea refused, but the longer she stood in the slow-moving line, the harder it rained. She chose a pink one, not her favorite color, but one that would stand out in the crowd.

            She was elated to get a ticket to one of the many shows she’d hoped to see, a spin-off of a romantic comedy she’d read years ago.

            That done, she spent the morning shopping for little gifts to bring home to her family and friends. A couple of keychains for Danny and Michelle, partners at work. Friendship bracelets for her cousin’s twin girls. A holographic image of the city’s skyline for her boss, to add the her collection displayed in the bookcase behind her desk.

            Laden with a variety of small, colorful bags, Andrea stepped into a pop-up Taco restaurant that smelled so delicious that she couldn’t pass it up.

            They sold only three varieties: shredded beef, diced grilled chicken, and a veggie combination that Andrea should have chosen, but didn’t. Not knowing how large the taco would be, she bought two: beef and chicken. Both were delicious.

            A glance at her watch told her she had enough time to get to her hotel, drop off her purchases, and get in line at the theater. Hurrying through the crowded streets, she was jostled repeatedly, but because she’d been warned, Andrea clutched everything close to her chest.

            One rid of her bags, she headed north on Broadway, mesmerized by the flashing, colorful, larger-than-life displays.

Just as she found the theater and got in line, a well-dressed man appeared on her right side.

“Are you interested in jewelry, mam?”

Andrea stared ahead, hoping to discourage him.

The line moved forward, just enough to leave a gap between her and the couple in front. The man filled that gap, a gap-toothed grin lighting up his face.

Andrea’s eyes looked him up and down, even though she tried not to. He was well-built, clean-shaven, dressed in clean jeans and a button-down collar shirt. His skin had a pleasant tan that was enhanced by bright yellow hair.

If she’d met him under different circumstances, she would have been interested in a first date. Maybe a second or third. Heck, she thought, perhaps even marriage!

Andrea knew he was a hustler, but was so intrigued by him that she actually looked at the bracelets he pulled out of a jacket pocket.

“Which do you like best?” he asked as he moved his arm back and forth, allowing them to glitter in the sun.

Andrea pinched her lips and shook her head. She knew better than to buy purloined goods, so when the line moved forward, she turned her eyes away.

“Do you like turquoise and silver?” He leaned forward, placing his head very close to hers.

Andrea smiled. Yes, she did, she wanted to say, but there’s no way it could be made of real stones and actual silver.

The man slid the bracelet off his arm and brought it closer to Andrea’s eyes. “I’ll sell it to you at a good price.” He beamed. “And, just for the heck of it,” he said as he reached into his coat pocket, “I’ll throw in the matching necklace for just five dollars more.”

She’d always wanted a turquoise and silver necklace and bracelet, but found them too expensive for her teacher’s salary. But, this pair was incredibly beautiful. The craftsmanship seemed refined, as if done by a silversmith working in a home studio.

Her heart pounded, telling her to touch it, just to see.

The line moved forward, much quicker this time. She was close to the door. The time to decide had arisen.

“Are the stones real?”

The man beamed.

Despite knowing better, Andrea bought them both. As she slid the bracelet onto her arm and placed the necklace inside her purse, she felt quite pleased with herself.

Over and over she told herself they were genuine materials. That she’d scored a bargain. That she’d never tell her friends that she’d fallen for a scam.

There was, after all, the possibility that they were real.

Existing with Long Covid

            Back in October 2023 I flew to Arizona to visit my long-time friend. We had a wonderful time, visiting a zoo, aquarium, bookstores and driving all over the Phoenix area. We were never caught in a crowd, even at restaurants.

            On the flight down I wore my mask the entire time. I intended to do the same on my flight back home, but my asthma was acting up, and I had no choice but to take it off.

            Three days later I tested positive for Covid. My doctor put me on meds that left a nasty taste in my mouth, but did help me get better faster.

            Unfortunately, the symptoms never went away. Brain Fog took away my ability to write and made it challenging for me to process the written word. I got agitated in crowds, so much so that I couldn’t think, make rational choices, and often found myself leaving lunch dates early.

            I spent hours on the couch, lacking the strength to hold a book. Every morning, I went to the gym, but seemed to get weaker and weaker as the days went by. Before long Covid blindsided me, I could lift ten pounds with one arm, twenty-five with two.

            Things got so bad that lifting a light-weight ball wore me out.

            My doctor referred me to a Physical Therapist who knew less about long Covid than I did. I told him about PEMS, Physical Exercise Malaise Syndrome, a condition that leaves a person weaker after exercise than they were before. I only saw him twice because he had nothing to offer.

            I was given an exploratory medication to take every night. It made a difference after a few days, then as weeks went by, I seemed to improve more and more.

            I was able to write again, but only in short segments. At first I’d work until my head felt like it was going to explode, give up, and go rest on the couch.

            Now I write for a bit, go do something else, write some more, do something else, and so on. I’ve been able to finish a short story!

            I used the same strategy with reading. I read for a bit, change activities, read some more. I can now read for about fifteen minutes at a time.

            I discovered that I could often get an audible copy of books I was reading. I’d listen to then in the car, at the gym, and at home when the TV wasn’t on. Switching between text and voice helped me get back my understanding of words.

            Some days I am able to do quite a bit at the gym. I begin working with weights. Pre-long Covid, I’d do three sets of ten. The PT said to reduce how many repetitions in a set (his one good piece of advice). So I’d lift five times, rest, five more, for two sets.

            Now most days I can complete two sets of eight. And I’ve gone from playing with balloons to five-pound weights.

            What I’ve learned is that I have to read my body. Some days I am still couch-bound. My joints hurt, my arms and legs too heavy to lift. On those days, all I can do is curl up and play games on my iPad.

            When walking with my friend or my husband, some days I can only make it to the bridge. Other days I can cover the entire loop.

            The same with swimming. I used to swim 32 laps, or half a mile. Once long Covid hit, I could only do four laps, not worth the bother. As time passed, I worked up to twelve laps: on good days. Last week I was exhausted after six.

            It feels as if I’m improving slowly, a little bit day by day. It’s two steps forward, one step back. Or maybe one step forward, one step back.

            My advice to anyone suffering with long Covid is to not give up. Don’t sink into the couch and stop living. Visit understanding friends who will work with you, going places when you have the energy, hanging out together when you don’t.

            Don’t quit trying. Instead do something you enjoy for a few minutes, come back to it after a bit of a rest.

            Ask for support. Call on family and friends to help with chores. That way the build-up of dust won’t bring you down. Maybe they can cook something for you, or drop food off, so you’re not stuck eating whatever junk food happens to be lying around.

            Get out of your house every day. If the weather is bad, walk inside a shopping center. When it’s good, walk your neighborhood, if it’s flat, or try out others for a change. Begin going around the block, then slowly going a tad further.

            Don’t give up when you have a bad day.

            Shrug it off, then the next morning get up with renewed determination.

            You can exist with long Covid. It’s not easy, but it’s possible.

Faith is My Rock

Fortunately, faith is my foundation.

Admittedly, I frequently fail.

Independently, however, I am nothing.

Truthfully, the Lord sits on my shoulder.

Hesitatingly, I listen before acting.

Inevitably, I stumble again and again.

Stupefyingly, He never crosses me off His list.

Miraculously, He trusts that I will do right.

Yearningly, my eyes plead for understanding.

Rigidly, He hangs on to my heart.

Occasionally, He allows me to slip.

Consequently, I lean a little harder.

Knowingly, then, He simply smiles.

Being a Teacher

            When I was placed in Kindergarten, I didn’t much care for my teachers. They seldom helped me, instead giving me very simple tasks such as coloring shapes with the correct crayon, cutting on dotted lines or tracing letters and numbers. Granted, those were the skills I most needed, but it was humiliating when I saw what my classmates were doing: learning to read and do math.

            What I did like about school was that it was a safe environment. No adult ever spanked me, shook me, threatened me with anything more serious than losing playground time. For the most part, until high school, most teachers acted as if I wasn’t in the room. I could sit in my desk all day without the teacher ever looking over my shoulder.

            When asked what I wanted to be, clear up into high school, my response was always, teacher. Teachers were sort of like heroes to me. They gave off an air of authority without, for the most part, threatening violence. There was an occasional crack of a ruler on my desk when I wasn’t paying attention, and I think only once, being sent to stand in the corner.

            Only one high school teacher seemed to care about me, Mr. K, my math teacher. He was kind, patient, and saw my innate mathematical skills. In other classes I feared going to the chalk board, but in Mr. K’s classes, it seemed like an honor. Why? He normally only asked me up there after several of my classmates had tried to solve an equation and failed.

            When I applied to college, I did so as a potential math major. Not to teach, however, but to be a statistician.  I liked working with numbers, but not with people. It seemed like an ideal job for me.

            All that changed during my junior year when the Department Chair called me to his office. He asked what I was doing there, and accused me of only choosing a major in math so I could find a husband. He insisted that I change my major.

            Since I was on a full scholarship that only covered four years, I didn’t have time to switch to a new major. Unless I chose one based on the number of completed credits I already had. That’s how I got a degree in Russian Languages and Literature. I didn’t see myself as a college professor or writing the new Russian novel. The only possibility that came to mind was working as a translator.

            When that fell through, and I had to find a job, quickly, I applied for anything that didn’t require impressive typing skills. I finally got hired by the IRS and made a nice career out of it, even though I hated every minute of every work day.

            When our first child was born, I knew nothing about little kids. I found a Parent-Child Education class being offered by the local Recreation Department. I learned music, art, dance, singing and activities of all kinds. It was fun, but intimidating when my turn to lead the class came on the rotation.

            I decided to apply to the community college to earn an AA degree in Childhood Education. I complete the program, got a job in the Rec. Dept. teaching Tot Time. There were ups and downs. Ups happened when the kids did what I asked and seemed to be having fun while they learned. Downs were when a snaked invaded my classroom or when a kid soiled themselves or threw up on themselves or on the equipment.

            The job became boring after just a few years.

            I then decided to earn an Elementary Teaching Credential. My sister-in-law paid my tuition, at the college where she worked. Some of the classes were fun, such as teaching PE or designing bulletin boards. Some were incredibly boring, such as the pedagogy of learning, phonics and writing lesson plans.

            After graduation I got hired at a Catholic Elementary where I taught for four years. This was my dream job, something I’d wanted since I graduated with my BA in Russian.

            The first three years were amazing. The fourth, the principal decided she wanted to push out all the older teachers, so she made my life miserable. I left.

            The next several years were ones of fruitless search. I discovered that all the PE teachers in my district were aging. I began work on a PE credential, but got bogged down when it was mandatory to referee a college-level soccer game.

            I kept getting sub jobs in Special Education classes as there was a chronic shortage of qualified teachers. I knew nothing about Spec Ed, but there was a need and I felt I could fill it.

            Back to college I went and after completing only six credits, I was hired.

            I experienced some difficult kids, but obnoxious parents. My Director of Special Education supported me, listened to me, stood by me. There was no established curriculum, so I had to devise my own, a combination of 4th and 5th grade subject-matter.

            I went to conferences, workshops and all types of sessions, learned something at each.

            At the end of those four years, I wanted something more.

            Back when I entered university to get my first credential, I weighed the differences between elementary and secondary curriculums. I felt as if I had no strengths in any of the subject taught at the high school level, but I could be the teacher of this and that. That’s why I chose elementary.

            A position opened up at the high school. My elementary school was getting a new principal, someone who had no idea what I had been doing and didn’t care as long as I kept my students out of her office. It was time to go.

            Little did I know that teaching high school Special Education students was the career I should have been pursuing.

            For 23 years I taught ninth and tenth grade English and an occasional Social Studies class.

            I loved those teenagers, offered them respect, treated them with dignity and challenged them to push themselves academically. Some did improve their reading and writing skills quite a bit over the two years they sat in my classes. Most improved somewhat, and very few made no progress whatsoever.

            In a rather roundabout way, I pursued my dream job. I did become a teacher. I did love what I was doing. I did enjoy going to work.

            Many of my high school students had unrealistic dreams, such as becoming a famous actor when they were too shy to speak in class. Or playing professional football when they didn’t get much field time during games. I even had one who wanted to be an airplane pilot when he had no control of his legs.

            We all need dreams. Dreams are what motivate us to move forward. Realistic dreams can become true, leading us to fulfilling lives.

            I learned to pursue, to never give up even when faced with challenges, to be open to change and to accept opportunities that had never popped into my brain!

The Dance

I saw a werewolf dancing a jig

He jumped, he spun, he shifted his wig

With twinkling toes and red-sparkling nails

His laughter echoed through hills and vales

His grin, his teeth, incredibly big

A handsome werewolf dancing a jig

His partner, a fairy in sparkling array

Acted as if she were dancing for pay

Amid  bold sneers and snickers guffawed

He heard only admirers applaud

That handsome werewolf dancing a jig

Was outdone by a talented pig

Judges awarded ribbon of red

“I thank you,” the winning dancer said

“I beat you fair and square,” said the pig.

Then that werewolf quit dancing a jig